Carnival Ride
by Tsukaimon
Summary: To him, Rin was one of the most dirty, most foul creatures alive...and yet, she was also the most beautiful.
1. Carnival

This story was adapted from the manga Boys Next Door. Both the main story and concept belong to Kaori Yuki.

Boys Next Door © Kaori Yuki

I do not own it nor Vocaloid.

* * *

_And when I looked at her smile..._

_I never believed anything could be so..._

So pure, so innocent...

**It burns an image in my eyes.**

_He cradled the bleeding girl in his arms, gently brushing her golden locks out of the way so he could see her eyes. Those turquoise blue eyes that stared into his very soul; he'd grown accustomed to it. With one finger, he wiped the blood that dripped from her open mouth, though it didn't do much good as more blood followed._

He scarcely heard the slam as the front door to his apartment slammed open. "T-this is..." a blue-haired man stuttered, barely able to form words at the sight before him. "What are you doing?" He still did not respond, not even when the man walked inside, followed by a brown haired woman.

"She's already dead!" the woman sobbed, tears filling her eyes. "Was it you who killed her? Hey!"

There was silence before he finally looked up at the two, glaring, the girls blood dripping down his arms as it soaked her surroundings. "How annoying," he whispered, bringing a finger to his lips. "Sssh. You'll wake Rin up..."

"You were born inside a carnival." That's what my mother told me when I was just I little boy. My mother...was an 'unstable' woman, you could say. She said things that...I was unable to understand, but I still tried to listen to her, I really did. My mother, she...

She always brought alot of men home...

...but she always took their money.

I couldn't stand it when she did that. It made me sick. Hell, I didn't even know who my father was. When I asked her, she always stated, "You were born inside a carnival." As if I could understand that!

It was always different men...she never brought the same ones home. I never understood why she did this. Even now, I still don't. But, deep down inside, I felt like it was wrong...it made me sick. I figured that maybe all adults understood what I didn't. Maybe when I grew up, I would understand, too.

I don't.

My mother...was never abusive toward me. She never screamed at me, or hit me...but she never cared for me. She wouldn't even look at me! I tried, and tried, and _tried_ to get her attention...but it always failed.

_It was like she was denying that I existed._

One day, she seemed...happier than usual. And she was looking at me! I wonder what had caused the sudden change, but nonetheless, I was happy! She took my hand and smiled at me. "Len, we're going to a carnival today..." I didn't believe her at first, but we really did go! It was a faraway carnival, too. It was the farthest I had ever been from home.

I wanted to do _everything!_ Eat cotton candy, ride the Merry-Go-Round, ride the Ferris Wheel, and the Tea Cups!

And there was a clown! He was juggling, grinning as kids gathered around to stare in awe at the sight. Then, he dropped all five of the balls he was juggling, the kids laughing as they all landed on his head. "Balloons!" I cried, letting go of my mother's hand. "I'll be right back, mom!" This was the best part of the day...

**And the worst.**

By the time I reached the jester, there was no balloon for me. "Sorry, kid," he said, putting on a fake smile as he patted my shoulder. "There's none left." I sighed, disappointed, then turned around.

Mom was gone.

_Mother...is there no balloon for me because I'm a child nobody wants?_

I was just a ten year old boy in a place I don't know...I didn't know where to go! Many times I was almost caught by the police, but I ran, and ran...I had to get home. I rode the subway...I hitchhiked...I even spent two days in the dangerous city, until finally, I reached my home...

_I prayed that when I saw my mother...that she would love me...like she never has._

I froze when I heard a scream, followed by a crash, coming from the house. "Yes, I'm telling the truth!" I heard my mother cry from inside. "He's the son I had when I was sixteen! Len isn't some lost, unrelated boy! _I'm telling you the truth!_"

I peered into the window...a man, one I didn't recognize, had my mother pinned to the floor, a large knife in his hand. He whispered something...I didn't hear, but my mother started screaming at him again. "Ten years ago, I went to a carnival...I went to the back of the Fun House, and I was raped by a man pretending to be a jester...I was pregnant by mistake!" She screamed as the man slashed her arm. "_So I left Len at the place where he came from!_"

The man started screaming again, and so did my mom...I didn't want to listen, though. I covered my ears...she slapped him in the face, he pushed her back down...and then...

He sliced open her chest. Once, twice...three times...I looked away. The front door suddenly swung open, and the man ran out, his shirt covered in blood...mom's blood. I looked down as I walked inside the open door.

Mom looked surprised when she saw me...then she started asking for help. "The phone, Len..." she wheezed, causing herself to lose more blood. "Hurry...once I get better, I'll take you to the carnival again...okay?"

I clenched my small fists. "And then..." I picked up the bloody knife that the man had used, tears rolling down my cheeks. "_Are you going to leave me there again?_" I only stabbed once...but that was enough to finish her. She didn't even have time to react to what I was doing. She still had that same look on her face...that sly grin that hid what she truly was. I wasn't fooled anymore.

Still, it was bothering me...

That face...

Those eyes...

**Quit looking at me like that!** When you were alive, you never looked at me! Don't look at me now that you're dead! Don't...don't look at me now!

Don't look at my weak, bloody hands...don't look at weak, ugly me!

I backed up against a table, and a flurry of photographs landed on the floor before me...these people...they can all see! All of them! Don't look at me, don't look at me...

I grabbed a marker, marking over each and everyone of their eyes...

All their eyes have been covered...

Mommy isn't looking at me anymore...

I looked at her. The crazed grin still remained on her face, but...her eyes were covered.

_Everything will be okay if their eyes are covered._

"That child...he stayed by the body of his mother for five days," one police officer said to another, sipping a cup of coffee as a chill entered the open door of the house.

"Wow!" the other officer said in surprise. "He seems to have experienced a huge shock!"

"Did you get bloody trying to take the knife out of your mother?" a woman, younger than my mother asked me gently. I was seated on the couch, drinking a cup of hot chocolate. "You should've called the police."

In this world, no one doubted an unlucky boy with no relatives.

"Why did you cover your mother's eyes?" the woman asked as I finished taking a sip.

I didn't answer for awhile, unsure of what to say. "Mommy was looking at me like she was mad," I answered her. I could tell she didn't know what to make of it, but she didn't exactly know how to contradict me, either.

Because I didn't want other kids to end up like me, I decided to be a teacher...

But I'm still not okay. I change from day to night.

I seek out those who sell out their bodies like my mother did.

I hate them.

**I hate them all!** They hate me, too. I can see it in their eyes...those dirty eyes...like my mother's.

I can't look at them!

But you...why are you different?

You are one of the dirtiest, most foul beings I know of...

And yet, you're also the most beautiful...

_You're the only one who is the most beautiful..._

This is the unspoken truth...

This world contains only one truth.

And I understand that now.

I love you...

**But because I love you, I kill you...**

**

* * *

**

I know this contains obvious foreshadowing. But it was needed. Stay tuned for when I write the next chapter!


	2. Sightless

This story was adapted from the manga Boys Next Door. Both the main story and concept belong to Kaori Yuki.

Boys Next Door © Kaori Yuki

I do not own it nor Vocaloid.

* * *

_Something so impure..._

No one could've guessed...

**Especially** me...

That it could be so beautiful...

It was always the same, really. These foul creatures, the ones who fear me, who cower, they are all the same, sick beings. They run, I chase. They hide, I track them.

_Like a game of cat and mouse._

This particular one was giving me a hard time...but I didn't particularly care; they always got tired out in the end, and I always catch them. This one led me straight into a dark alley. Hm, how cliche.

**They couldn't run from me anymore...**

They begged me, but I felt no sympathy. Not for a creature as dirty as this. As if it memory of my first 'triumph', I pulled out a gleaming knife and struck it into the dirty victim's chest. A scream managed to escape their lips, but it quickly lowed into a gurgled gasp as blood spilled from their mouth.

It was another job done...but, oh, I almost forgot the most important thing...

**They cannot look at me.**

Indeed, this victim...and all of the foul creatures that I have killed...they all have that same dirty face, those same dirty eyes...the same eyes as the one who haunts me.

_And I still cannot stand it._

I think it's instinct for me. I cannot bear for those dirty eyes to look upon me...me, their murderer, the weak man with the bloody hands...

_The ugly, weak child nobody wants..._

My victims, since the very first one, they have all been blindfolded by me. Thus, earning me my nickname...

**"The Blind Man."**

In this city, word seems to spread fast, so I never stay at the crime scene for long. I stand up, putting the wiping the bloody knife off on the victims still-clean jacket before putting it back where it belongs. I turned around, ready to walk out of the alley and blend in with the crowd, when I finally notice...

_Someone has been watching me._

A girl, some years younger than myself, was watching me with a dull gaze. Though the alley was dark, I could see her face...though, there wasn't much of an emotion on it. Golden bangs fell down above her blue eyes, and she simply stared at me...for a moment, I was frozen in place.

_I had been caught._

"Hey, Rin!" a high-pitched, feminine voice echoed through the alleyway as a teal-haired female ran behind the young girl, apparently named 'Rin'. "Hurry up, or Kaito will beat you again..." Rin did not look back at the female; she continued to stare at me.

I stared back at her, my eyes wide. I didn't feel fear exactly, but...I was unable to look any longer. I jumped up and rushed passed Rin, passed the teal-haired female and out the alley. "Woah!" the girl gasped ad I nearly knocked her over. She put her hands on her hips in annoyance. "How rude!"

Rin still did not reply. She shifted her gaze from where I had been to the place where the victim lie, blood still pouring from the wound that the knife had made. The teal-haired female followed her gaze, gasping as she finally caught sight of the body. "Oh my God," she whispered, covering her mouth as if she was going to be sick. "Is...is she dead?" She turned to Rin, then looked over her shoulder, as if I was standing there. "Could that guy have been the killer?"

Rin knelt down in front of the body, her eyes setting on a small necklace that rested in the pool of blood.

_My necklace._

"How freaky!" the teal-haired girl exclaimed. "Rin, look!"

**Another victim of the man who kills young prostitutes...the "Blind Man!**

People stared at me as I ran down the street. I didn't stop, though, nor did I look at any of them. _I killed someone!_

_I've already...I've already had relationships with six girls...so I had to blindfold their eyes and kill them._

_I am the one who is talked about on the news...the killer of young prostitutes...the "Blind Man"!_

_When I kill people...my chest gets hot...so hot, I feel like I'm going to die...as if I'll burn to death..._

_I-I'm unable to stop these desires..._ I clenched my fists. _Does this mean I'm crazy?_

_Just now..._ My mind drifted back to the girl, the one who's eyes could see right through you. _That girl, she saw my face..._

_I'm finished! It's all over!_

**ALL OVER!**

"Hey, what's this?" I heard somebody yell. I froze. "Mr. Kagamine!"

"...huh?" I turned around. I let out a sigh of relief when I saw a pink-haired girl, Luka.

She was glaring down at a young girl with light green hair. She wore a pair of broken goggles and a somewhat-tattered dress. "Honestly, Gumi is too much! I can't handle her!" she glared at the girl one more in annoyance. "Just look at Gakupo's injuries!" A boy held onto Luka's pantleg, several bruises and scrapes on his face, his eyes puffy from tears. "Is she really a girl?"

Gumi huffed in annoyance, crossing her arms and looking away as I knelt down before her. "Gumi, again? Why were you fighting?" I asked her gently; though tomboyish in personality, she never was one to hurt people unprovoked.

"G-Gakupo said," she looked down, barely speaking above a whisper. "Gakupo told me that I'm a child nobody wants..." My eyes widened, a memory burning fresh in my mind.

I turned to Gakupo, putting a hand on the teary-eyed boy's head. "Gakupo..." I said to him. "Do you know what adults like me call that? They call it "prejudice". It started a long time ago, and it's still a problem in this country." He looked up me, and I spoke more gently. "It's only because you don't have the problem. But because somebody else does, that makes you feel superior. You shouldn't think like that. It's wrong."

"Enough!" I heard Gumi cry suddenly.

"Hmm?" I turned to look at her.

She had her small hands clenched into fists, trying her hardest to fight back tears that were threatening to spill over. "You make me sound like a pitiful, unfortunate child!" She pushed passed Luka and began to run away.

"Gumi!" Luka called after her, practically seething. She huffed in annoyance. "That child...she has no consideration! You were only trying to help..."

"No," I interrupted her, smiling in understanding at the direction where Gumi had ran. "I was the one who wasn't considerate..." I met Luka's gaze as she stared at me in confusion. "I am just like her...I was a foster child as well."

Luka stared at me, surprised, as we began to walk together. "Oh...?"

I looked up in remembrance as I recalled the events. "My mother was single," I told her. "When she was killed, I was sent to many different orphanges."

"Oh...I'm sorry, I didn't know..." Luka whispered.

"Don't worry," I smiled at her. "Do not look at Gumi in that way. She's a really nice kid." We turned as we reached the end of the sidewalk. "We live very close, so she always comes over to play with Wolfy."

"Is Wolfy your dog?" Luka asked me.

I chuckled. "No...not really. How do I say it...?" I was interrupted by the sound of footsteps quickly running up behind me. I felt someone's arms wrap around me suddenly, and a necklace was dangled in front of my face.

**My necklace.**

"Is this the name tag the master bought for his pet?" a female voice asked in a whisper. "There's a phone number, too, in case the pet gets lost." I felt the person lie their head against my shoulder.

I turned around quickly, and the person stepped away, still dangling the necklace in front of them. "Who are you?" My eyes widened when I caught sight of the person. _It's her!_

"Rin Kagamine," the female answered, almost smirking a bit as she wrapped her hand around Wolfy's name tag.

_That's...that's her!_

_How could she have it?_

_I must...I must've dropped it!_

"That's a really nice name," Luka answered with a bit of a smile. "Hmm, are you Mr. Kagamine's friend?"

_This can't be!_

"Yes," Rin answered her.

_She'll reveal everything!_

She turned to me, those same emotionless eyes staring into my soul. "It's been a long time since we last saw each other," Rin said, meaning the words mostly for me. "Can I meet with you tonight...big brother Len?"

"Oh! I didn't know Mr. Kagamine had a cute sister," Luka exclaimed, her smile widening.

_Did she...did she use my phone number?_

She walked up to me.

_What does she want?_

She had Wolfy's name tag around her neck, twirling her finger around it. "Well," she said with a raised eyebrow. "Does it look good on me, brother?"

_What is she doing? She should've just given it to the police!_

"Well," she told me with a bit of a smirk, holding out a small piece of paper in her hand. "Come to this place tonight." She placed the paper in my shirt pocket. "Until then, I'll wear this chain around my neck." She hugged me once.

_That girl...it's like she can see right through me..._

"I'll only give it back if you come!" she called as she ran away, waving.

_How can this be?_

_What is she thinking?_

**Doesn't she already know the truth about me!**

She was strange...too strange...

_If that could be..._

It would be perfect happiness!

It's just...this way that I love you...

**I kill you...**

I know this contains obvious foreshadowing. But it was needed. Stay tuned for when I write the next chapter!


	3. Killing Me

_Well..._

It seems, my dear...

That you and I...

**We're walking on thin ice.**

* * *

I was so freaking horror-struck when I found the address; a club. A freaking club. Of _course_ that's where I end up, surrounded by the thing I hate the most. If I survive this...

When I walked up to the front door, two men were looking at me funny. They were large, bulky men in leather clothes, and they wore shades. Security guards, obviously. Regardless, they didn't do anything to me as I approached the door to knock...but I could tell they were suspicious.

_They knew who I was. I could tell._

There were two women leaning against the building, dressed in those disgusting outfits...filthy vermin, they were. As I knocked, a panel in the door slid open, and a man peered through to glare at me suspiciously from behind his sunglasses. "What are you doing here?" the man asked in a deep voice. "Did you come to the wrong place?"

I opened my mouth to say something, but he interrupted me. "Go home!" he told me. "_Next!_" He began to slide the panel back again.

"W-wait!" I cried, putting my hand on the door as the security guards came closer to pull me away. "Some girl wanted me to come here tonight!" I held up a card Rin had given me along with the club's address. "Her name is Rin!"

After a few moments, the panel slid open once more, and once again I met the man's suspicious gaze. "...are you sure?" He opened the door and let me inside. I felt relief for a moment, but that was quickly extinguished when I caught sight of everything.

_Down here, it's like every other club..._

"Go up one floor from here," the man instructed me. "To the blue room." _This is the guy who wanted to see Rin...this guy?_

I nodded gratefully to him, glad to escape from my worst nightmare for just a moment.

_But...could this place be...?_

_Can it be...?_

I opened the door, half-expecting what I found inside. I refuse to go into detail, but Rin turned and smirked at me as she heard me enter the room, climbing off of an agitated male, who was handcuffed to the bed. "You were slow in getting here, Len."

"What? Hey!" the male yelled, annoyed as Rin put her shirt back on and slid on a jacket.

"Let's go, Len," she told me. I followed silently, and I couldn't help but laugh at the man who was still screaming curses at Rin, seething.

"Wait a sec!" the male called as I opened the door for Rin, allowing her to leave first. "The fun is just starting! How could you leave now? Don't joke around! Kaito's going to be back soon! If he finds out what I was going to do to you, he'll kill me! _Rin_!" The man was silent for a moment. "Oh, come on! At least untie me!"

Rin decided it was best if we talked in the bathroom instead of the bedroom. I didn't object, though I felt a bit uncomfortable being in a women's bathroom. "It's better in here," the golden-haired girl explained as she pulled me inside. "Our boss is very careful; he hides recording devices under the bed. You don't want others to hear this, right?"

I stared at her. "You...you're a..." I stuttered before my anger suddenly flared up. "This is a prostitute house! You're living your life by selling your body! You're still young! What about school? How can you live the life of a-" I cut myself off there, suddenly feeling like that would be...too much. "...how can you live a life like this?"

Rin stared at me for a few moments, her eyes wide in blatant disbelief, then, too my surprise, she started laughing. "You're such a passionate teacher!" Then, she raised an eyebrow at me. "But should you be able to tell me what to do? After all..." I could tell what was coming as she gave me a grin similar to that of the Cheshire cat. "During the day, you put on the facade of a normal, everyday school teacher...but at night, you turn into a killer who slaughters young prostitutes!"

This girl..._she's going to be the death of me!_ I clutched my head as if I was in pain, backing away from her a bit. "Stop! I don't want to talk about that!" I met her gaze, and she was looking at me with that same dull expression she had when she first saw me. "You...I know what you want...money, right?" I had collected a good amount of money...and I needed it. But this girl was driving me insane, and if this got her out of my life, she could have it...I threw every bit of money I had to her.

She simply watched as it slowly fell to the floor.

I grabbed her by the collar of her jacket, pulling her closer. "Return that tag to me!" I told her desperately. She didn't react as I yanked it from around her neck. "...this..." On closer observation, I realized it wasn't mine. "This is a fake! Where is the real one?"

"My friend has it," she told me simply. "If I disappear, or if I am killed, she'll turn it into the police."

I stared at her, angry. What does she want? "What the hell do you want from me?" I cried.

She looked at me now, a new emotion in her eyes I could not comprehend. "Take me away from this place," she told me. "I want to be free."

I stared at her for a few moments. "You...want to escape?" I asked. "You should just run away!"

She sighed, shaking her head, her blue eyes actually looking distraught for a moment, and God forbid I feel pity for her. "It's not that simple. I've run away, many times," she explained. "But I was always found and nearly beaten to death." She shed her jacket and pulled down her shirt just enough so that I could see a tattoo on her chest. "This mark makes me property of Kaito, my boss. I can't run away by myself."

"I-I can't help you!" I cried. "I'm just a school teacher! I don't even know how I'd get you out of here! You're making things complicated.

There was an awkward silence before she spoke again. "Do you really want that thing back?" she asked me, though I didn't answer. "Then...I'll tell you where it is." She pushed herself up from where she was sitting and walked over to me. She grabbed ahold of my shirt collar, standing on tiptoe and pretty much forcing me into a kiss. She put a hand on my chest, beginning to unbutton the jacket I was wearing and pulling it off altogether. She had begun to rid herself of her shirt, as well as mine, before my brain finally started working again and I pushed her a bit off of me a bit too roughly.

"Enough!" I cried, wiping my mouth off on my shirt sleeve in sheer disgust as she fell back against the wall. "It's disgusting!" I turned around and, without even glancing back at her, ran out the bathroom door.

_Dangerous! That girl is dangerous all over!_

I ran out of that place and into the darkening city, panting.

_Run faster! I have to get far away from her..._

**Or else her eyes will trap me!**

I didn't stop running until I reached my house, panting as I leaned against my wall to keep myself from collapsing. I felt something rub against my leg, and I jumped in surprise as I looked down to see my pet iguana, Wolfy. "Oh, Wolfy," I said when I had finally gotten my breath back. "I'm sorry. I bought you a name tag, but I, uh, lost it." The large iguana just stared at me.

_That's it! Her eyes are like the eyes of an iguana!_

_Completely void of feeling..._

_Eyes that say, "I know everything about you!_

"I'll give you food right away, Wolfy," I leaned down to him. "Here."

_Those eyes...are frightening me..._

_The only thing to do is to kill her!_

**I must kill her!**

* * *

_Listen, the jester is calling._

Do you want a balloon?

**Come one, come all!**

Ladies and gentleman!

Sorry, there aren't anymore, kid.

Mother...

Were there no more balloons because I'm a child nobody wants?

Mother...

Did you leave me because YOU didn't want me?

Mother...

**Did I kill you because I didn't want YOU?**


	4. My Murderer

__

___I never liked video games._

They always told me the same message over and over.

**Game Over.**

_

* * *

_

"Kaito!" a man cried, bursting through the office door of his boss, Kaito, waving a picture in his hand frantically. "This is a picture of the victim that was killed the other day."

Kaito looked over his shoulder in annoyance, giving the man a look, as if to say, "Couldn't you have knocked?"

"I asked around the other day and got this through connections," the man explained. "The police are very confidential about it!"

Kaito only puffed some smoke as he smoked his cigarette.

"Hey, Kaito!" said the man, annoyed. "Are you listening to me?" The man gasped and quickly let go of the picture as Kaito tossed a dart, almost jabbing the man's hand in the process.

"I can hear you very clearly," Kaito said calmly, turning around in his chair to look at the picture. "I am also looking very clearly."

_

* * *

I walked down the street silently, listening to the sound of cars driving by. I didn't really expect to get Wolfy's name tag back from that girl, so I was going to go by a new one. "You little thief!" I heard someone cry. I turned to see a man holding a little girl by the collar of her shirt, trying to pry a music box from her hand. "I'll report you to the police!"_

_Gumi!_ "Wait!" I cried, running over and trying to pull Gumi away. "This child is my student!"

"What does that matter?" the man seethed, glaring at me. "This kid stole from me!"

"Then I'll pay you for that music box!" I told him, reaching into my pocket and searching for my wallet. "I'll pay you right n-" _Shit! I gave all the money I had to that girl..._

"Here!" I heard someone say. I turned to see that girl, Rin, wearing a white sweater and the same jacket she wore last night. She was leaning against the store window, holding out some money in her hand. "This is your's, Len."  


* * *

"Don't do that kind of thing again, Gumi!" I scolded her after the drama had managed to settle down. We had settled down on some steps that lead up to a large house near mine. "You could've just asked your new parents to buy it for you."

Gumi didn't look at me; she was staring at Rin, curiosity in her eyes. "Who are you?" she asked.

"_Gumi!_"

Rin laughed, pointing at me. "I'm this block-head teacher's sister, Rin!"

"Oh," Gumi replied, staring from me to Rin, me to Rin, probably trying to catch all the similarities. We stood up and began walking to my house.

"There is obviously the age difference," she said with a smile. "But Len has helped me out more than anyone. He helped me with my studies, he was great at football, and our parents had high hopes in him." Rin looked up at the sky, her eyes distant. "But the stress was to much for him, and he ran away from home."

_Is this...the story of Rin's real brother? No, the only thing that matters...is that the one I must kill is standing right before my eyes...now is not the time to be listening to what she is saying!_

"In my parents eyes, he was the only one who mattered," Rin continued. "Not long afterwards, I ran away, too. I came here to find my brother."

"Here," Gumi said once we had reached my home, holding out the music box to me.

"Huh?"

"For now, keep it at your house, Mr. Kagamine," Gumi told me. "If I tell them that you bought it for me...they'll just worry. So it's better if I listen to it at your house..."

I smiled at her. "Alright."

_Even if she rebels...she's also letting her parents close to her heart...Gumi..._

_

* * *

_

_"You really are a good teacher, Len," Rin told me, smiling. She had settled herself in front of a mirror in my bedroom, playing with the music box that now sat there. She looked over her shoulder at me. "Everytime I passed, I would think that. You smile and laugh with your students, and it tells me how much you care about them."_

_She's...seen me before...?_

"I don't know why, but I could never forget your smile," she continued. "It's because your smile was always so sad, like you were in trouble...I always wondered why..." She frowned at me. "And then I discovered your secret."

I looked at her darkly, not speaking.

"I speak to much," she said, moving from where she was sitting to sit on my bed. "But what I said about my brother was true. You...kind of remind me of him."

"And then what...?" I asked. "Did you find your brother?"

"No."

_Why...?_

She smiled, but it looked sad and full of regret. "I don't think we'll ever meet."

_Why am I still talking to her...?_

"Oh, yes!" she exclaimed, pulling some money out of her pocket. "This is all of the money you gave to me, right? I'm returning it to you..."

_I must kill this girl! I must kill her...!_

She held it out to me.

_...is it alright if I don't kill her?_

I was taken aback when Rin suddenly threw the money down and tackled me, taking me by surprise as I landed on the bed. "This is...revenge for yesterday!" Her eyes were dark, soulless. "Have you thought of people like me, who's hearts also get hurt? _Do you think I like what I do?_"

_Her eyes..._

"What pride can we have?" she cried. "It's better to just forget that!" Her eyes once again became distant. "But...if it's with someone else, I can handle that..."

_Her eyes will steal my soul away!_

"But you..." she whispered, caressing my cheek and leaning closer. "Only you...I can handle if you treat me that way!"

I stared at her, my eyes wide, as she continued. "You said before that it was 'disgusting'. And you are right," she told me. "But...why would humans do this to each other for pleasure?

_"Everyone goes around trying to find their soul mate...but, no matter how hard they look, they can never find it."_

"So, instead, they force to bodies together."

"...it's funny, isn't it? Strange...and sad."

"Everyone wants to use that short time together to open their hearts, even if it's just a one night dream they bought with money..."

"...I hate doing it, but I also like it!"

She leaned downed, running her hand through my hair as she brought her lips to my neck. "No...I can't..." I whispered. "I..I have to kill you!"

"Fine, then, kill me!" she cried.

_Cook me for a day and night...make me into stew._

She unbuttoned my shirt, throwing off her jacket.

_When my entire body has been eaten by you, I sha'll truly belong to you..._

She took off her shirt, proceeding to discard me of the rest of my clothing herself.

_I'll become your blood and flesh._

I pressed my lips against hers.

_If we join together like this, you'll be able to reach my heart..._

_

* * *

_

_"I was born in a carnival."_

Mother always told me this.

She never cared for me.

She never loved me.

But I loved her. I loved her so much.

And it angered me so to watch her do what she did.

But I hated her, too.

I hated her so much!

She was a liar, and a cheat.

She cheated me, and every man she's ever been with.

I guess you can say that's what caused her death...

Her murder.

By the hands of her own son.

She scarred me...scarred me for life.

That's why...that's why I search for people who sell their body like my mother did.

They're dirty, and...I start to hate them...I hate them so much!

I can't stop stabbing with the knife!

They use those dirty eyes to look at me!

I have to blind them!

If I don't, I'll go mad!

**No matter how hard I crawl, struggle...**

I can't get out...

It's no use...

"Who are you killing?" Rin asked my, grabbing my wrists and pushing me back down. "Your mother? People who sell their bodies? Or..." She looked me in the eye. "Is it...yourself?" I stared at her. "It's enough now...you don't have to kill anymore." She gently kissed my forehead. "_You've been forgiven..._" She hugged me. "So forgive yourself!"

Too my surprise, I felt my eyes fill up with tears. "You're...you're not scared of me? Not one bit?" I chuckled darkly to myself. "You're strange, Rin...too strange..." She held me in her arms as I sobbed.

"Yeah," she smiled at me, rubbing my back comfortingly. "Let me be crazy with you!"

_I don't have to...I don't have to kill myself like this anymore..._

_**"My murderer..."**_

_

* * *

**Breakfast...**_

Lunch...

Dinner...

...

Dessert...  



	5. Please Read

Hello, everyone. Sorry for going so long without updating; bet a lot of you are pretty pissed, neh? Sorry about that. Procrastination is a pain. But I'll be rewriting 'Carnival Ride', under a different name this time, essentially the same idea. It'll also still be based off of 'Boys Next Door', but it'll pretty much be in my own words, not just copying the words of the manga. Don't worry, you wont have to wait long for it, but I figured doing this was better than just not doing it at all. Once again, I apologize, and thank you for waiting.


End file.
